Islamic terrorists set off a bomb at Glasgow Airport at the weekend, setting light to the front of the terminal building.
Glasgow Police say the bomb did more than one hundred and twenty thousand pounds' worth of improvements (Thank-you Ironwood).
Ok, it's an obvious joke, but I'm an Edinburgh resident, so I'm obliged to make it, just like everybody else has, already.
By the way, I love the fact that, when you're a terrorist in Glasgow, driving a car packed with a potentially lethal payload, you're on fire yourself, and you're waving a Molotov cocktail, the most likely outcome is that locals will immediately run at you and beat you into submission. Now that's hard.
Has anyone else noticed that the quality of the explosive devices available to our UK-based fundamentalist brethren has been going steadily downhill? In the first lot of London bombings they used proper, honest-to-goodness bombs, capabale of generating a shockwave, overpressure and everything. In the second set of attacks, the idea was fair enough, but their nitrate-based explosives failed to go off, leading to a casualty list of rather more limited extent: one attacker who danced around with his back smouldering for a bit.
The latest tranche have seen three cars packed with gas cylinders, petrol and nails, and apparently lit with matches. They're going through a bad patch. Unless they bring in someone from outside, the next set of attacks will have to be carried out with cars stuffed to the gunwales with wood, newspaper and firelighters, maybe topped off with diesel and with a detonator made of a boy scout with a digital watch, furiously rubbing two sticks together.
P.S. Americans! be the envy of other news broadcasters by pronounced Glasgow correctly! it's "Glaz-goh". it does not rhyme with cow.
P.P.S. Although it was glasgow airport that was hit, the location is actually in Paisley. Clearly, this marks a shift in tactics by our fundamentaloid cousins, who by bombing Paisley are trying to appeal to right-thinking Greenockians everywhere.