April 2007 - Posts

Walking Around Middle Earth: A Lord of the Rings Online Review

When it comes to reviewing Lord of the Rings: Online - Shadows of Angmar (or whatever the complex punctuation involved in the actual title really is) I am a little late to the party.  I've dabbled with it since closed Beta last year, but intentionally didn't overdo it, since this was a game I've really looked forward to since about, oh, 1984 or so?  I didn't want to see too much of what was going on behind the curtain.  I felt an urgent need, nay desire, to suspend my disbelief.

The Barrowdowns

For a good first impression, see what Brad wrote over at the War Room.  Reviews in general have been pretty positive overall, although I was surprised at just how highly CVG rated it: a 9.2 is a startlingly high figure. with the consensus being that Turbine have managed a solid, polished release that builds substantially upon the rather under-performing Dungeons and Dragons Online release from last year.

Instead of going over well-trodden ground, I'll just do this in bullet-point format.

  • It's a good game, well balanced and fun, which has learned a lot of the lessons taught by World of Warcraft.  The game's producer has done himself favours for his next role.
  • It looks gorgeous.  With all the options turned on - just about possible on my new machine - it looks wonderful.  Looking down towards the Grey Havens from the bridge between the Shire and Duillond is spectacular and beautiful.  Emyn Hoeth at night is deeply threatening.  Bree is huge: I can only wonder what Minis Tirith will be like.
  • They launched at just the right time.  WoW's Burning Crusade expansion has proven to be rather underwhelming, and its first couple of months seem to have persuaded a fair number of players that the time is right to look around for The Next Game.
  • As Tobold has pointed out, the graphical style is a cracking balance.  It has fallen into neither the bilious cartoonery of WoW nor the Land of Poo colour-scheme of EQ2 and others.Marshes
  • There is a ton of content: far more than a single character can meaningfully consume.
  • If you like Middle Earth, this is a feast.  I ran from the dwarf-hold at Gondamon to Bree last night, which is about half the width of the current worldspace, and it took a long time.  But you felt you really were running through a living landscape.  Specifically, through Tolkien's living landscape.  The Shire in particular was wonderfully bucolic, with gentle, rolling landscapes and leafy forests separating a multitude of towns and villages.  I passed through Bywater, and over the Brandywine Bridge, but didn't have time to head up to Hobbiton or east to Weathertop or, beyond that, the foothills of the Misty Mountains and Angmar.  Everywhere I was recognising names and places from the book.  So inspired, I immediately went back to re-read the trilogy.
  • There are some tweaking issues.  Admittedly, the servers are packed due to everyone being at roughly the same level, but finding the right sort of bears or wolves for various tasks can be infuriating.  Goblin stingers - a particular variety of missile-armed goblins - were in particularly short supply.  Spawn rates need adjusted.
  • Codemasters - the European publishers who are running the servers on this side of the Atlantic - are as incompetent as they always have been.  The launch has been largely good, for which we can thank the mature Turbine engine.  But the servers have been down twice for looong periods up to a day or so, and it is noticeable that the US servers have not suffered similarly.  Likewise, the account-management web pages are awful affairs that simply cannot handle any sort of load, a problem I remember from D&D Online.
  • Deeds are a great mechanic for those, like myself, given to "collecting" achievements.  By granting titles, they give in-character reasons to pursure goals of exploration or beast-slaying.  And by then granting abilities, they give the powergamers a target as well.  I've already seen more of Middle Earth than I would have otherwise, thanks to the rewards for doing so.
The Old Forest

I can't wait for the landscape to expand as new releases are brought out over time.  Turbine have always been good with frequent content updates, but they've surpassed themselves with the anouncement that whole new regions will be released a matter of weeks after launch.  That's a nice way to give the game added momentum immediately post-launch.  So in June there will be the chance to head into Northern Eriador to the Shores of Evendim.

My mouth waters at what is to come afterwards.  Most exciting will be Moria, of course, which I imagine will not be restricted to one expansion, and which might justify an entire, paid-for box release of its own.  The central shaft is not called the Endless Staircase for nothing, after all: all the way from the depths of Moria up to Durin's Tower atop Celebdil. And the chaos that will be present after the passage of the Fellowship and the slaying of the Balrog will be rich with storyline opportunities.  Will the dwarfs already be looking to clear out the cave trolls and orcs and repeat Balin's attempt to reclaim Khazad-dum?  Having seen the dungeon in the starting signature quest for dwarfs and Elves, through which Gimli leads new characters, I am excited: that was the best representation of a classic RPG dungeon I have ever seen, with vast spaces and spiralling, vaulting stairways across many levels.  And Moria would dwarf it (dwarf... geddit?)

But Moria is just one area.  Mirkwood could justify a couple itself, with spiders, Thranduil and the necromancer's old base at Dol-Guldor to think of.  The Misty Mountains are a huge opportunity, with Orthanc in the south.  Gondor, Minas Tirith and Minas Ithil, Osgiliath, Rohan, Dale and the Lonely Mountain (each of those latter two facing invasion from Mordor's Easterling allies), the Dagorlad Marshes, Belfalas and the Corsairs: each of these offers huge possibilities.  Lorien, Fangorn, Umbar, the Paths of the Dead?  And then, of course, there are the other three-quarters of the content: Haradwaith and beyond.

Potential.  Lots of it.  I chose the one-off lifetime subscription option.

Declension narrative

Tobold, en passant, makes a great point:

We live in an age where people write as much as never before in the history of mankind: text messages, e-mails, blogs, game chats. And it turns out that one of the reasons why many people didn't write so much in previous ages is that they don't know how. They still don't know how, but somehow the social inhibition ... has become lost.

They simply claim that "u" and "r" are just socially acceptable short forms of "you" and "are", mix in some newly invented slang like "roxxor" and "pwn", some acronyms like "lol", and soon the phrases they're writing looks so unlike correct English that nobody even notices that they just spelled a couple of words wrong, and have no idea of the correct use of punctuation.

I hadn't considered the hugely increased use of the written form amongst a wider section of the population.  I was aware that i conduct a lot of my interactions in writing, mainly through emails.  Those, however, merely replaced the letters I used to churn out in the eighties and early nineties (when enough of my friends started getting email addresses to make that viable).  But people who, after leaving school, only wrote in Christmas cards and official forms now communicate widely in textual form.

And they're not very good at it.  Partly through lack of practise; partly because of an unwillingness to read widely enough to absorb correct use of language.  But Tobold is right: at the heart of the matter is a reluctance to accept that there are good and bad ways to use language.  Depressingly many people claim that "r u rdy" is as valid a form of language as "are you ready?"  I have heard that the subjunctive is making a small comeback in some quarters: I would that it were more obvious.  In the main, written language is devolving as those perfectly capable of writing well are disinhibited by constant exposure to sloppily-constructed emails and 10-character, verb free text-messages, and become drawn into the habit of using abbreviated terms and discarding or abusing potentially vital punctuation (not least the comma).  The resulting inexactitude will lead to misunderstanding.  That's all very well when arranging where to meet that night, but rather less excusable when stating user requirements for a civil-engineering project.

Not to mention that it's horrible to read.

Ever-So-Sensible New Cars and Computers

In a horrific week for the domestic capital budget, I have so far bought a new car and a new computer.  I can only assume that I shall round the week off with a new house, or perhaps a second hand Sea Harrier or the like.

Anyway, despair not, bank manager!  For, just at the point where Dragon slams headlong into his mid-life crisis, I get over mine and jump straight to my middle-aged spread.  It is a tragic fact that I have never really been interested in cars.  Not real cars.  Ones on Project Gotham 3 are great, because I can do fun things with them.  But all I do with them in real life is drive them at 30mph around town or 70mph in very straight lines.  And believe me that a Z3 does not sit easily with a wife, a dog and an regular second hound.  Or rather, the wife does not sit easily: not when the footwell is, as often as not, shared with two growing collies.  It is a tawdry and saddening fact that, much as I enjoy putting the roof down, I only bought the Z3 on the spur of the moment one morning, mainly to alleviate the boredom of re-coding a pension administration system.

So today I picked it up, having tried out 2 land rovers (Unreliable?  The door-warning electrics on the first one 2-year-old Discovery failed during the test-drive!), a Rav4 (cramped but nice and punchy), and an X3 (puhlease) I got a huge, practical and utterly mundane car.  Today, after I picked it up, the hounds wandered around the rear luggage area, far enough away from me that I could see their mouths open and close almost a second before the bark reached me.

Re the computer, it is a Dell XPS210 with dual core processors and 4Gb of ram, 19" flat screen monitor, massive disk and more stuff like that.  "Endie," I hear you say.  "How can you claim that purchasing an overpowered dragster of a PC like that from Dell's performance range is in any way sensible?".  Well, gentle reader, breath easily.  I costed it on Dell's site and it came to just a shade over £1400, but I bought it through Dell's ebay outlet for well under half that.  The Dell factory outlet is a cracking thing if you are happy with eBay and know what to bid for stuff: usually it's been built for a customer but has a scratch on it.  Since my computers sit in movable mountings so I can wheel them about to wherever I need them, a fascia scratch is essentialy invisible.

Fear the piercing gaze of my economical eye.

Super Morton Dancing in the Streets of Raith

There are, ummm, significant disadvantages to supporting a little club like Greenock Morton: in the last decade we have been relegated to - and have languished in - the second division (which, for those not versed in the minutiae of Scottish football is actually the third division, below the Premier League and the first division).  We even spent a season in the bottom league - the "Third" Division - in 2002-2003, and had to release all of our players in order to survive, building a team in the week or so before the season's start when the financial situation was retreived.  We were almost closed by a property developer who combined malevolence, dishonesty and massive incompetence in equal quantities.

But there are silver linings, of a sort, to supporting such a club.  For one thing, as a Liverpool fan I am disappointed with every game we lose.  As a Morton fan, every victory is a delight.  Reaching the fourth round of the cup by beating Premier League opposition is the cause of great celebration.  Winning 9-1 to boost our chances of promotion is the icing on the cake.

Anyway, on Saturday we at at last achieved promotion back to the first division, which is probably where we belong.  Morton's travelling support at away matches is consistently bigger than the home gates of any other team in our league.  And despite losing to Raith Rovers on Saturday, the fact that our nearest rivals also stumbled meant that we were promoted by default, with two games yet to be played.  So, having done my time and paid my dues by supporting the Mighty Ton through the lean years, I have had the chance to enjoy our second promotion in four years.  I'll even get to see my team on telly on Saturday nights!

Silly Child, Vile Mother

This story is that of a silly, unlucky child and a vile-sounding mother.

The kid decides to have a party while her parents are away.  That is an absolutely standard rite-of-passage thing to do.  The internet is a novel element, and mentioning it on mySpace meant that strangers turned up, it got badly out of hand, and twenty-thousand pounds' worth of damage was done.

Well, the mother says it was twenty grand.  From the description, I am sure that she is vastly exaggerating.  But the number is beside the point.

The fact is that the kid made a mistake.  A big mistake.  But children make errors.  As a parent, her job is to help her kid learn from it, and to display unconditional love and forgiveness at the same time as exerting discipline.  She needs to show that actions have consequences, but that at least parents stick by their kids.

Not Mrs Bell of Chipchase Court.  She compares having damage done to her house to rape, no less.  She complains that she left the house immaculate.  I'l bet se did: everything about her comments screams possessions-centred, obsessive-compulsive middle-classed woman.  She has sent her child away to stay with friends, presumably unable to stand having a house-rapist under ths same roof.  She has refused to forgive her, justifying this on the grounds of the amount of damage done.  Perhaps forgiving her kid is worth eight thousand, but not twenty-thousand pounds.  The character painted of Mrs Bell in the BBC article is the most generous and human of those I have so far read.

Mrs Bell says that she may never be able to bring herself to return to the house.  She is just the sort of drearily unpleasant member of the "respectable" middle classes that Saki or Wilde would have had a field day with.

Poor kid.  She was stupid, but I can certainly construct a scenario in which almost two decades of taking her shoes off when in the house, washing her hands before using light-switches, not scuffing her feet on the hall carpet, and always putting the green mugs on the middle shelf made her, on some semi-conscious level, say "sod this, the world can come, and bring their mates..."

An infantryman's view of Iraq

On the Something Awful forums we've got a forum called "Ask/Tell", where you can post stuff like "Ask me what it's like to be a heroin addict" and people can ask a recovering smack-addict all the stuff they've seen in movies and find out it's nowhere near as bad as the real thing, or "Tell me about Glasgow, Scotland" because they're off there to uni there, and people will tell them all about it.

It's a pretty impressive forum - my favourite on the SA site - and the stories people are able to tell can be startling.  I have certainly learnt a lot about areas of life I thought I understood, but really didn't.  And I've also been able to offer some help in some of the "Tell me about..." threads.

Anyway, one that caught my eye was by a Goon (SA member) called "Roy of CA" who is serving in an infantry regiment in Iraq's worst hellhole. We have had a few thread like this from Goons  serving in Iraq of Afghanistan, but usually some time after they return, or from a position with the gear in the rear.  This bloke is in Ramadi, which is pretty much the worst place to be in the world right now, barring the caldera of a few of the more active volcanos.  The questions are a mixture:  some from people who are really interested and others from right- and (mainly) left-wingers trying to get him to say stuff that backs their preconceived positions. He's too smart for that, but at the same time sounds like a scary bastard.  He introduces himself by saying "I am a Specialist in the United States Army's infantry. I am the 'one man' on my team, meaning when we enter any building or go into an fire fight, I am the lead person."  His thread is a strange mixture of bravado, grim fatalism, heroic willingness, brotherhood, and brutal violence.

If you don't have a subscription to Something Awful you can only view two or three pages of the forums a day, so here are some of his answers to questions put to him, out of the hundreds he has answered:

"I have been blown up 7 times, 3 of them being from a car bomb. I have been sniped 3 times, all three missed (one bounced off my gun). I have been in too many firefights to remember."

Q: What do you think of the way that the current administration has conducted the war?

A: I do not think strategically, I think tactically. I don't think "I would move that brigade over there" I think "I need another guy on that rooftop".

Q: I would also like to know what you would prefer the government's next step be in the war. Would you prefer if they pulled out? Would you prefer if they sent in more troops/stayed? I'm really curious.

A: America can pull out everyone, just leave us here because most of us don't want to leave, we want to kill or capture more Al-qaida.

Q: My troop was just in Ramadi less then 8 months ago

If you are with the 506th, you are with the shittest unit I have ever seen in my whole life (band of brothers indeed). The 506th did absolutely nothing to secure the city, they sat on their base and stopped doing patrols, stopped counterfiring on mortar attacks, stopped everything.

If you are 506 then you have absolutely no reason to ever talk to me other than to apologize for leaving the sector like this (like your Battalion Commander apologized to our BC for leaving the sector like this).

Q: Is there anything you guys need/want that I could ship to you? Candy, books, movies?

When you guys send care packages, please don't send candy. No one over here eats the candy you send. Send tuna packages. Everyone here eats tuna, everyone.

Q: I'm headed into transpo pretty soon. Are there many supply convoys on the MSR that you see or provide security for?

Boy, did your recruiter *** you...I hope you are ready to get blown up more than me man, transportation sucks. Good luck.

Q: What is the freakiest or most surreal thing that you have seen or have happened to you while you were in an actual gunfight or battle?

The freakiest, by far, is one I will never forget. I saw a man accidently shoot an RPG in mid air. Both sides stopped firing for about 3 seconds (in a fight thats a long ass time) and we all were like "whoa...did that just happen?".

The Haaji shot an RPG from a rooftop down onto us and this guy actually shot the thing mid air (he obviously was just aiming at the Haaji). It was something I will never forget.

Q: Could you tell us about those? Obviously a car bomb/IED sucks because you never know when they're going to hit and it just instantly fucks anyones *** up without warning.

I really don't know what people see in the whole war story thing. I just don't get i into my own stories much. I guess because I was there and it's all a repeat of *** I don't wanna repeat sometimes.

What exactly do you wanna know?

When a car bomb goes off, everything is grey after. the sky, the ground, everyone's skin around you, all grey. Things are falling on you for the next few minutes. Body parts are all over everything, stuff you don't know what it is but you know it's human.

I got hit with a VBIED when I was checking for car bombs at a ECP (entry control point into the city) back during the elections. I remember running up to a guy I thought looked bad and I asked him "hey dude you ok....oh" It was just his vest. He had no head/arms/legs.

Q: When you return home do you retain your hatred for Haaji?

Absolutely. Every single person I even think is an arab pisses me off just by being anywhere fucking near me. Most of us can tell between an arab and an indian, a south american, etc etc. We know a Haaji when we see one usually.

I have snapped on a Haaji many many times in the states. My wife has helped me alot with that.

I can't look at them without wanting to smash their fucking face into the back of their head sometimes, and sometimes I can't look at them and not feel sorry for them, even if they're rich. It's weird, I dunno.

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=2409489

It's a strange thing about this conflict: the ability to speak to someone almost real-time who is serving on the very front lines.  He might not come back from today's operation.  Or he might just have been on a 4-day OP in someone's house and turn up again answering questions as if there had been no delay.

Is Joss Whedon still going?

From Easily Distracted comes the chance to identify myself, apparently, with just about every cast member of Serenity:


 

Your results:
You are Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
80%
River (Stowaway)
80%
Derrial Book (Shepherd)
80%
Wash (Ship Pilot)
70%
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)
60%
Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)
60%
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)
60%
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)
55%
Inara Serra (Companion)
50%
A Reaver (Cannibal)
40%
Alliance
40%
Dependable and trustworthy.
You love your significant other and
you are a tough cookie when in a conflict.

Click here to take the "Which Serenity character am I?" quiz...

I was delighted to see that I was 40% Reaver.  I think I fell down on the question "Are you a cannibal?" there: I was forced to answer "No, I have never even been to any German-speaking internet chat rooms."

Serenity (and Firefly) is the Joss Whedon property that I actually liked.  Not enought to watch it all - I think I've seen half the episodes - but more than Angel or Buffy, each of which held my interest for the bulk of one series, and both of which drifted into drearily tedious as they progressed.

Geeky coincidence

When I came into work on my birthday yesterday, the number of items in my inbox was exactly the same as the year of my birth: one thousand, nine-hundred and seventy.  There you go.

 

300, seen at last

I finally saw 300 on Sunday.  It was just as good as I expected.  And my expectations were high.

There are a few idiot reviewers showing off their ability to read an encyclopaedia article on Thermopylae and decrying the film for this or that inaccuracy.  The point is that this is a story elevated to the level of myth, of heroes doing awe-inspiring things.  And we are so jaded, seeing miracles with every visit to the cinema, that "merely" showing the courage, bravery and discipline of the Greeks over those three days wouldn't satisfy viewers who think that of course heroes can beat hundred-to-one odds.  So we see rhinoceroses and elephants; Xerxes becomes a towering, androgynous Latin American; arrows truly do blot out the sun; the earth really does shake beneath the feet of the eastern armies.  The pedants are like art critics in 1874 complaining that Monet's "Impression, Sunrise" didn't look realistic enough.  This is cinematic impressionism.

There are small weaknesses.  The old Vietnam-war-movie problem of "who is who under the helmet" means that the enemy tend to be signalled by making them as foreign from the Greeks* as possible: The Persian Empire thus ends up very African in character (insert western-centric tinfoil-hat theory here).  Delios' (Faramir's) accent is awkward and stilted.  In such a battle, brutality and blood must be represented, but a couple of decapitations are lingered over for too long.  And the director decided that the ladies needed more time with Queen Gorgas on screen, which means several utterly unnecessary cuts back to Sparta.

Fortunately, the bit at home is utterly unrelated to everything that goes on in the rest of the film, so, when watching on DVD, it will be a matter of pressing the skip button once and you're back to the battle.  Since the rest of the movie is basically a shot-for-shot filiming of the book, the sub-plot about Gorgas that is tacked on has not managed, through some hideous process of angiogenesis, to infiltrate and corrupt the "proper" movie.

The other bit that annoyed me in a purely pedantic way is that the Spartans only fight "properly" - in a phalanx - once.  The first fight is amazing, with the clash, the press of spears and co-ordinated movement of the Spartans immensely atmospheric.  The other fight scenes degenerate into one-on-ones that the Persians could only have dreamt of them engaging in.  Greek hoplite battles against lighter opponents were sometimes unusual in that the enemy's rout could be the time when most Greek losses occurred.  This happened at Marathon.  But I admit that a film full of grindingly realistic phalanx warfare would have been tedious.

And, putting that aside, the way that the battle scenes use variable speed of playback to present very beautiful recreations of forms from friezes and from black- and red-figure pottery is spectacular and moving, barring only the odd gratuitous decapitation.  The placement and poses of the actors in the scene of Leonidas' return with the wolf is like seeing a scene from the Elgin Marbles come back to life.  This evocation impressed me more than anything else about the brilliantly exquisite cinematography.

-----

*To those who complain that the Greeks didn't look anything like Greeks: do they really believe that 2,500 years of population movements, of invasions and occupation by Macedonians, Romans, Goths, Bulgars, Ottomans and more have left the Greek appearance untouched?  Leonidas looked damnably close to typical Greek black-figure pottery heroes.

Better Rugby

After the woes of my last rugby outing, it was a relief simply to reach full time and be able to count all my teeth.  But the drama.  The excitement.  Boys' Own stuff, I tell you.  This post won't make much sense unless you were there, but it's basically just a diary entry for me.

We turned around at half-time, already a man down to injuries and trailing by four tries, a conversion and a penalty to one try: 25-5.  The forwards had been functioning well enough, but the opposition had imported no fewer than six ringers from a couple of leagues higher (a nasty move which their old, tight-head prop disapproved of sufficiently to tell us about), and they were using the extra man well in the loose.  Worse, our scrum-half had to retire injured, leaving us reduced to thirteen players and staring down the barrel of a 60-pointer.  It did, at least, give the opportunity to use the line "the world will know.. that few.. stood against many" in the half-time talk.

Anyway, for the second week in a row, I found myself at scrum half, which with no numbers wide basically meant that I had to chip-and-chase, pick-and go or offload to a forward at every breakdown.  Amazingly, one kick found touch five metres out: cue a catch-and-drive and a rolling maul: in a foolish, gambler's move I called in the winger and a centre, and drove in myself.  Amazingly, we wheeled and scored.  25-12.  I like playing scrum-half because you get to be involved in every move, which makes you look better.  At wing-forward, much of what you do is intentionally buried deep enough or otherwise so obfuscated that the ref can't see it, which means that few other people do, either.

Next, a tap-penalty: these I love, so it was straight at the opposition, who perhaps assumed that a scrum-half would off-load.  Down to deck, recycle, nobody holding me so back up again, round the back and pass to a forward hanging off.  By now we are five metres out: another rolling maul into which I call the winger, leading their blind-side cover to panic and try and stop a repetition by coming in as well, so I call for the ball, drive over and score a couple of metres wide of the posts.  25-19.  Three minutes left.

By now they are in a state, with their imports shouting that they are "not *&^%ing losing to this shower of useless *&^%s".  Yet again their kick-off comes to me - only one of their restarts didn't - so I get to run it back at them, then chuck it to a lock (Angus) out of the tackle.  Some idiot loses the head and tries a chip and chase which doesn't work, so up we go for a line-out on their 22, which Angus steals, tapping down to me.  I go round the tail, less sniping than battering since my left ankle was shot by now, but find the angle anyway and drive up to within a couple of metres, flip the ball up again to the same lock as before, who drives over, ten metres to the right of the posts.  Our kicker does the necessary.  25-26.  The restart comes to me again, we drive, recycle, and I ask the referee at the base of the ruck how long we have. That's it, he says, so I hoof it out, backwards so that they can't charge down the kick.  Game over, we win, cue delight and joy unbounded.  With glorious sunshine on a cool, March day and an unlikely win to show for our efforts it was one of those perfect games.  You don't get that many of them when compared to filthy February mud and double-figure losses to Gala, but they are a week's worth of joy when they happen.

EMI Removes DRM and Ups Quality, Apple Tags Along

As can be seen in the following link - which I admit I checked the date on for April 1st Tomfoolery on after a quick skim - EMI have announced that they will be removing digital rights management code from their entire catalogue as of May.  Further, they will be upping the quality from 128kbps to 256 kbps.  The upgrade charge will be 30 cents per track, but the new, higher-quality, DRM-free albums will be available at the same price as the old, lower-quality, DRMed ones.

Steve Jobs managed to say with a straight face:

"Some doubted our sincerity to break the iTunes bond between the store and iPod player. Hopefully, people can see that Apple is only concerned with doing the right thing for the customer."

Audience members with residual hearing in the upper frequencies normally lost by the time we reach 12 or so reported hearing an odd sound as Jobs said this, as if of grinding teeth.  I mean, who's fooled?  But for pending lawsuits and the fact that EMI were moving in this direction already, Jobs would have kept everything that iTunes sells locked down until Judgement Day.

Anyway, a big thank-you to EMI for trusting the consumer to responsibly enjoy their music without abusing that privilege through heedless and feckless piracy.  Now, I'll download everything beginning with "A" and stick it on my share: everyone else take one letter each, except, um, Z and X and maybe Q: whoever gets them can...

Diet, Lifestyle and Managing Prostate Cancer

Pushing three years ago now, someone close to me was diagnosed with prostate cancer.  Without going into too much detail, the prognosis he was given was not good, and the impression he was given was that there was, essentially, nothing he could do that would alter his condition.  A timetable was mapped out, with depressing certainty on the part of the doctor as to the apparently inevitable progress of the cancer.  The doctor in question was very convincing, too, and did a good job of stripping away hope and optimism.

One of the advantages of always thinking you know better than everyone else, even experts in their fields, is that just occasionally, when it really matters, it turns out that you're right.  I had no real reason to think the doctor wrong, but I really, really wanted him to be wrong, and did a lot of research into what would help.  And the doctor was wrong: his timetable has already passed.  The individual's PSA has fallen dramatically, from a rather high number down to what the lab calls "less than 0.1": below that which they can meaningfully measure.  It has taken a lot of hard work, both on his part, and on that of his wife.

I've been uncertain about writing this post: I'm not a doctor, and the statistical sample involved here is low (only a few people, now).  But on the basis of the precautionary principle, I thought I should write some of this down for other people to use as they wish.  I've provided links to studies and news items where I have them freely available (not where I am using my work sources: unfortunately those cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to get access to).  In a couple of cases to do with calcium, where no accessible news item of similar summary is available, I've had to cite actual papers (with links to abstracts).  Since they're invariably virtually unreadable in their complexity, my apologies.

Enough backstory.  Here is the good stuff.

Diet

Stop drinking milk.  Seriously.  The exact mechanisms involved in the growth of prostate cancer are not fully understood, but one important factor seems to be the amount of intracelluar free calcium in your body.  Cut out as much of this as you can, by looking at what in your diet is rich in calcium, especially dairy foods.  Of course, calcium is important to your body in things like maintaining bone strength, so make sure and maintain bone mass through exercise, below.  Iin any case, you'll never get all the calcium out of your diet.

Cut back on processed sugar: cancer as a disease seems to be a glycophile: it loves sugar.  Consider not consuming quite as much processed sugar in your diet.

Avoid red meats and animal fats.  Asian men have low rates of prostate cancer, right up until the point where they start eating western diets, rich in the animal fats they eat less of originally.  Especially avoid hormone-laden, intensively farmed red meats.  If you think that giving up beefburgers is too high a price to pay, then fair enough, but you were warned!

On the other hand, there are things you should try to eat and drink more of.  Soy protein seems to be helpful, as it contains isoflavones which are thought to help fight cancer.

Drink pomegranate juice.  There is some evidence from the UCLA that this could be really very important indeed.  If you can get unpasteurised pomegranate juice, so much the better: this is what the UCLA used in their study.  It seems to dramatically slow the spread of the cancer in many men.  Here is a quote from the UCLA's latest summary of their study, published just yesterday:

"The initial study, involving 50 patients, found that the average time it took for PSA levels to double among prostate cancer patients drinking the juice was 54 months, nearly four times the doubling time of 15 months at the start of the study. Patients who have short doubling times are more likely to die from their cancer."

Lycopenes are pretty fashionable right now, and study after study has been publicised fairly broadly about their cancer-fighting or preventing qualities.  You can get them in pill form, but you can get a lot of them from tomatoes, if they are prepared correctly.  For best results, lightly fry tomatoes in olive oil.  But tomato ketchup or tomato-based sauces are great, too.

Consume vitamin D in moderation.  And get some sunlight: your body creates huge amounts of vitamin D when exposed to only moderate sunlight.  Vitamin D seems to help fight prostate cancer.

Eat cruciferous vegetables: cauliflower, broccoli, and the much-maligned brussels sprout are believed to have roles in fighting cancer.  Blueberries contain powerful antioxidant chemicals, and are well worth eating if you can.  Green tea (and soy protein, mentioned above) also contain antioxidants.  Green tea in particular has been a focus of interest, and results have been mixed: cancer is a complex state-machine and some elements perhaps block or enhance each other.  But some evidence does suggest a useful role for green tea.

Basically, cut back on meat as much as you feel you can, and eat vegetables, pulses, fruits and the like.  Fish, especially wild fish, are probably pretty good for you.

Exercise

Once you have prostate cancer, weight seems to matter.  Overweight men are less likely to develop prostate cancer.  But once they have it, slim men are more likely to survive.  This could be due to a combination of lifestyle factors, including diet as well as exercise.  But exercising is pretty unlikely to harm you, and if it is the difference between living and dying, motivation should be a bit easier.

To be more assertive about it, there are more and more studies showing a link between exercise and control of prostate cancer progression.

Also, if you are cutting back on calcium then you need to maintain bone mass.  No matter what you do, there will still be calcium in your diet.  You want your body to be using it for what it's good for.  For this, you want to do some moderately high-impact exercise, like running.

Attitude

Everyone knows, these days, that a positive attitude is really important to surviving cancer.  I'm not going to go into that bit.

At my work, we spend most of our time thinking about the middle east, and other oil-producing states.  But a portion of our staff are pharmaceuticals analysts, so I get to speak to them, and to use one of the best databases in the world on treatment developments.

Three years ago, there was still a lot of dubiety over the causes and the mechanisms involved in prostate cancer.  There have been big advances over that time, and a range of treatments are developing.  Three years ago there was no approved treatment for hormone-refractory prostate cancer.  All the money seemed to be going into the politically-organised fight against breast cancer.  Now there are life-extending treatments like taxotere, and more on the way, like the first ever therapeutic anti-cancer vaccine, Provenge, which was recomended for FDA approval only a couple of days ago.  There are a range of other treatments in the trial stage, most of which will probably fail, but some of which might succeed.

The stuff I've mentioned here is all about managing your condition, not curing it.  But with such work going into finding treatments, it is surely worth doing the hard work in diet and exercise that will mean still being around when the scientists arrive at a cure.  And if you are eating and exercising in the manner I've described above then you're pretty likely to find yourself a lot healthier than the people around you who don't have cancer.

A Tale of Liars, Midgets and Incompetents

How lucky we are, during the ongoing crisis with the eschatological fruit-loops currently dominant in the Iranian government to have in place an incompetent intellectual midget in Margaret Beckett, who has been repeatedly shown to be nowhere near up to the task of dealing with the role of foreign secretary, and who has demonstrated an inability to speak on anything but domestic political matters.

As a bonus, we have a placeholding nobody in Des Browne in place at Defence, whose role is granted as a result of his his loyalties in Labour's inter-nicene struggle.

Britain has a strong and simple case over the Iranians' piracy and kidnapping, and are dealing with an administration that is anything but monolithic. In moments of dark hilarity, the Iranians even bungled their attempts to make up a location inside their own waters. And they did so not once but twice. But a largely sympathetic United Nations has been so mishandled that we can't even get a decent resolution in our favour. It is truly dismal when one considers that Jack Straw would have handled the situation better.