Wednesday, May 17, 2006 - Posts

Barca!

I was one of the few people I know who both wanted and expected Barcelona to beat Arsenal tonight in the Champions' League Final.  Since my own Liverpool couldn't, I was delighted that the excellent Larsson proved the difference.  The incisive Henry aside, Barcelona were clearly superior in every area bar set pieces (where, interestingly, there was far less of a gap than expected).

But listening to the devotedly skewed viewpoint of the commentators was kinda wearing.  This was not a case of English commentators backing an English team: as ever the English elements of the team were having to rein in the worst of the fawning excesses perpetrated by my fellow Scot, Andy Gray.  Gray could not see that the referee had to send off Jens Lehmann for clearly grabbing the ankle of Eto'o as he ran past, potentially to score.  He could, quite legally, have allowed the goal for Barca that he chalked off and gone back to send off Lehmann (who I have tended to dislike, but whose dignified post-match interview rather won me over).  But Gray's suggestion - that he be yellow-carded "for the good of the spectacle" - would have been a nightmare for next year's referee: players, realising that the rules are applied less stringently in champions' league finals, would have entered the next one aware that anything short of impaling their opposite number in the old Romanian style, skinning him alive and feeding his raw, filleted toes to his gagging, wailing children would lead to a kindly shake of the head and a stern but fatherly admonition from the officials.

And the fury at this clear implementation of the laws of the game was balanced by admiring laughter at Eboue's blatant dive at the other end, which led to the Arsenal goal.  Had this been perpetrated by Johnny Spaniard, there would have been howls of complaint and a litany of comparisons between the honest northerners and their perfidious southern neighbours.  The first Barca goal was clearly onside, and unanimously called as such afterwards by the studio team, bur Gray was as partisan as ever and simply asserted throughout, in the face of plentiful video evidence, that it was offside.

All in all, I thought it was a fun, competitive final, in which both sides did themselves credit.  Nowhere near the level of last year's spectacle - the greatest final ever - but enjoyable as a tactical contest.  Arsenal scoring first was good for the game, as the better attacking side had to come forward onto them from then on.  Henry and Ronaldinho were less dominant than expected: the former was inneffectual with his last touch, while the latter was marked out of the game, while believing he could still run through the aassembled hordes of attendant Frenchmen.  Unfortunately for Henry, his misses proved sufficient to decide the game.

In Country Ah Shau Valley 1967

Leech-infested water, sheer cliffs in the middle of the jungle that you didn't see 'til you were in touching distance, sleeping three hours a night in a scraped-out hole that only served to gather the constant f*cking rain, all day spent humping sixty pound packs up seventy degree hills with some dien cei dau ell-tee trying to get us killed crossing swamps most ricky tick due to the 140 varieties of poisonous snake that pass for wildlife and ti-ti to listen to all day but the sound of Charlie shelling Ripcord...  Man, I loved the Ah Shau...

OK, I am so easily distracted.  I was supposed to be performing the hideously tedious job of uploading the pictures from last weekend's vacances en masse, but I'll just end up stealing Sandy and Lesley's (which are better than mine) in any case.  So I ended up playing at "what would I have looked like in 'Nam?"  This was the best I can do.  I admit it's just a lightly filtered crop of one of the pics in the gallery, but I like it.  Black and white just looked weirdly like I was wearing blackface, what with the camo stick.  At best, it looked like something from the video for the old track "Nineteen".

I think that there is some sort of a career there for me.  Not soldiering, obviously: my impulse control is too poor and I would end up on the front page of the Sun bringing shame on the regiment, the country and the family name.  But maybe some sort of make-up artist.  A big, manly one, obviously.